First date ideas in the UK: where to go, and where not

Good first date ideas in the UK share three traits: you can hear each other, either of you can leave within the hour, and there is something to look at when the conversation dips. A quiet pub, a canal walk, a free museum or a pub quiz all qualify. The cinema and the tasting menu don't.

Choosing where to go isn't a logistical footnote. The venue sets how long you stay, how loud it is, how close you sit and how easily either of you can make an exit. In other words, it decides a good deal of what happens next. Every idea below is built for British towns and British weather, which is to say they all come with a plan B involving a roof.

What makes a good first date venue?

Run any suggestion through three questions.

• Can we talk without raising our voices? If you have to lean in and say 'sorry?' twice a minute, the evening is lost before the first round.
• Is there an easy way out? A date that can end after one drink, or at the end of a walk, relaxes everyone, including the person who is enjoying themselves.
• Is there something else to look at? A view, a painting, a dog, a quiz sheet. Something to share when you both run out of words for a moment.

Everything else follows from that.

Eight first date ideas that work in the UK

An early drink in a proper pub

The classic, and it earns its place. One drink, a corner table, a weeknight. The trick is timing: six o'clock on a Wednesday, not eight on a Friday when the big screen is showing the match and a hen do has taken the back room. Pick the pub for its chairs and its volume, not its reputation, and do a quick walk past beforehand if you don't know it.

A walk that ends somewhere

Walking side by side takes away the face-to-face stare, which is the most intimidating arrangement there is. Silences feel natural, you are looking at the same view, and your hands have something to do. Give the walk a destination: a canal towpath to a lock-side café, the seafront to the end of the pier, a park to the good bakery on the far side. Aimless wandering drifts; a destination carries you.

A free museum or gallery

The walls supply the conversation, which is a great safety net when you don't know each other. Many of Britain's big public museums, from Kelvingrove in Glasgow to the Walker in Liverpool and the national collections in London, cost nothing to get in, so nobody has to fuss about who is paying. Plenty also run occasional late openings with a bar. You learn a surprising amount about someone from what they stop in front of.

The pub quiz

Underrated. You are on the same team from the first question, you have something to do with your nerves, and you find out quickly whether they are competitive, gracious, or the sort who argues with the quizmaster over the capital of Australia. Go as a pair, not a team of six, and don't take it too seriously.

A covered market with food stalls

Leeds Kirkgate, Borough in London, the Grainger in Newcastle: a market gives you something to wander round, something to point at and something to share, and it has a built-in ending when you run out of stalls. Go on a weekday or early on a Saturday, before the crowds make conversation a contact sport.

Crazy golf, bowling or darts

Low stakes and a bit silly, which is the point. You see how the other person copes with being bad at something, and nobody has to hold eye contact for long. One round, one game, then a drink if it's going well.

A class or a taster

A pottery taster, a brewery tour, a life-drawing evening at the local arts centre. It takes a bit of nerve to suggest, but it gives you a shared memory straight away, and a shared memory is a good thing to take into a second date.

Coffee and a bench

For people who don't drink, or who would rather keep things in daylight. A takeaway coffee and a bench with a view is cheap, sober and easy to extend or end. Its only weakness is the weather, which brings us to the next section.

First date ideas for when it rains

Because it will. Keep an indoor fallback in your back pocket for any outdoor plan: the museum near the park, the pub halfway along the towpath, the covered market rather than the open-air one. A bookshop with a café upstairs is a good wet-weather option, as is a board game café, where the game gives you something to talk about and a reason to laugh at each other.

The one thing to avoid on a wet day is standing outside a full pub deciding what to do next. Have the plan B before you need it.

Three to avoid

The cinema. Two hours in the dark next to someone you can't talk to. A lovely third date, a poor first one.

The smart restaurant. Too long, too expensive, too formal. The bill creates an imbalance nobody needs on a first evening, and there is no graceful exit between the starter and the main.

'Come round to mine.' However kindly you mean it, it removes the easy exit, and the easy exit is the whole point of a first date.

Should you talk on the phone first?

A fifteen-minute call before you go anywhere changes more than you would think. You hear their voice, their pace and their sense of humour, and you know whether there is something worth exploring before you have crossed town for it. Texting vs calling covers when to make the switch, and if ringing someone new feels daunting, what a first call is like is laid out step by step.

It also makes the date itself easier. You arrive with a thread already started, and the first ten minutes feel less like a cold open.

Before you suggest it

• Would I happily go there on my own?
• Could they turn this down without it being awkward?
• Can I get there on time without sprinting from the station?

If the answer is yes to all three, suggest it. Then have a look at our first date tips for what to do once you are there, and at awkward silence for the moment the conversation takes a breath.

Frequently asked questions

What is a good first date idea in the UK?

An early drink in a quiet pub on a weeknight is hard to beat: it is short, cheap and easy to leave or extend. A walk with a destination, a free museum or a pub quiz are strong alternatives. The best ideas let you hear each other, give you something to look at, and let either person leave gracefully.

What should you avoid on a first date?

Avoid the cinema, where you can't talk, and smart restaurants, which are long, formal and awkward to leave. Inviting someone round to your place removes the easy exit and can make them uncomfortable. Very loud bars, busy Friday nights and anywhere that needs a long journey home also tend to work against you.

Is a pub a good place for a first date?

Yes, provided you pick the right pub and the right time. Go early on a weeknight, find somewhere with a quiet corner, and avoid match nights. One drink gives you a natural end point, and the round system makes the bill easy. Check the place beforehand if you don't know it, so you're not caught out by the volume.

What are good rainy day first date ideas?

A museum or gallery, a covered market, a bookshop café, a board game café or a pub quiz all work well when the weather turns. The key is to have an indoor plan B for any outdoor idea, so you are not standing in the rain deciding what to do. A long lunch is best saved for a later date.